In the Kingdom

Quiere cantar su alegria a mi tierra Mexicana

Posts tagged feminist

29 notes

My biggest issue with “if you want equal rights, why can’t I hit you?” isn’t just that it normalizes violence and puts an unsettling focus on the ability to continue being violent to women, but that its completely wipes out consent from the equation. People like to argue that men hit one another from time to time during fights, but fail to recognize that fights are, typically, consensual. And when they’re not, they’re more frowned upon than a consensual fight. You’re literally confused that women don’t want to be struck suddenly, without even the slightest awareness that the situation was going to get violent? Really? As if women aren’t already disproportionately victims of violent crime, but hitting a woman because you’re angry with her is not the same is an escalated conflict with another man (or anyone, really) in which the person was preparing for or had an inkling that violence might ensue. The concern with being allowed to hit women doesn’t come from a deep fear or a potential necessity for self-defense. It comes from a desire to make violence against women consumable. And that’s disturbing.

Filed under feminism feminist domestic violence tw men's rights

76 notes

Here’s the thing: Women not wanting to be around men is not misandry. If there’s any hint of seriousness in the statement, it’s typically supported by instances — isolated or lifelong — where men have hurt, violated, humiliated her and/or otherwise made her uncomfortable. Not because “boys r dum” or because they play video games or behave in some way that’s annoying.

This is what makes the reverse, “If I said I didn’t want to be around women, I’d be a sexist!” inherently ludicrous. Because if a man said a woman violated him or humiliated him in a way that made him feel stripped of his humanity, the general feminist population will — or at least should — be sympathetic. Trauma can be incredibly difficult to deal with, and everyone’s needs should be respected while they are recovering. The problem with the reverse is that the men who spout off about this aren’t implying that they should avoid women to avoid feeling triggered or otherwise pained. It’s because they don’t want women in their spaces because they are not on par with their standards, they are a nuisance and they do not feel they owe them that basic respect of allowing them to exist among them.

Sorry, being rejected by someone you were “in love with” or thinking women don’t understand you is not trauma. It is not sufficient enough reason to eschew womanhood and suggest that women sit behind some boundary when they are around you. And if you consider any of that trifling nonsense to be trauma, well — whose got the victim complex now?

Filed under feminism misogyny misandry feminist sexism

7 notes

Male opinions on how women should comport and present themselves are literally the last thing I care about. Even less than dog shit and roaches. I’d sooner campaign to save the subway rats before giving half a damn of what a man thinks of me. Fuck you, I don’t exist to please you. And at least rats can be cuddly.

Filed under feminism sexism misogyny misandry feminist

12 notes

You know what I’m getting so sick of? People acting like at a certain age, feminist women join a covenant of raging harpies bent on destroying the male population. I’m over people treating feminism like it’s a space where arrogant, whiny, irrelevant, unintelligent women go to feel wanted by seeking to destroy others.

I didn’t need feminism to teach what the fuck was wrong with the world.

  • When I would look in the mirror and scrutinize myself, feeling my skin up and down for hair, then look at myself in disgust if I found any of it as if it was the most unnatural thing that ever happened, I knew it was wrong. I knew it was awful that I was shut up in the bathroom near tears at 12 years old because boys said girls with hair were “nasty.” I knew feeling like I had “body hair issues” that far superseded other girls at my school was farfetched. Other girls clearly had to shave, too. But I felt like the only one. Or like I had “too much to take care of.” I didn’t need feminism to know I was driving myself fucking insane when I shouldn’t have been.
  • When I hated my breasts because I didn’t think they were sexually pleasing to boys when I was 14, I didn’t know shit about feminism. When women would tell me that I would grow in to my body and not everyone was the same, I didn’t believe them. I couldn’t believe them because of the crap I heard people (even other girls) say about female bodies. I didn’t need feminism to know boys viewed girls’ bodies unrealistically and that it was unfair.
  • When I tried to be friends with boys in high school and got smacked, made to feel uncomfortable and told to “suck it up,” I knew I was getting a crap deal. I knew it was wrong that the only way to be friends with boys was to be a boy. I knew boys didn’t want to associate with me as anything more than a bank of sexual questions and perhaps sexual encounters. I didn’t need feminism to know boys didn’t treat me fairly or care about my friendship.
  • I didn’t know fuck all about feminism when I saw the only way boys were accepted in school was to behave violently—and often disrespectfully. Boys who were quieter, intellectual and gentle were bullied or took to hanging out alone or with a small, eclectic mix of people all unfit to be in the “boys club.” I didn’t need feminism to realize it was fucked up that “real masculinity” was defined on such crude, unacceptable behavior—and that any man who didn’t fit that was as unwelcome as I was.
  • When I would help people with their homework, I was hailed as “the smart girl,” but no one ever credited their success to me. It wasn’t that I needed the recognition, but I knew there was something inherently fucked with boys asking me to tutor them, then turning around and pretending they didn’t know me. I didn’t need feminism to realize that it was awful that admitting a girl was smarter than you was shameful.
  • I didn’t need feminism to realize when my friend and I were running away from older men chasing us in their car that, that sort of thing typically didn’t happen to men. It wasn’t a ground-breaking discovery that women didn’t wait outside of my high school waiting to follow young boys home, hooting at them for expressed sexual purposes.
  • Being taught that crime was more likely to happen to me because I was a girl, whether that was true or not, wasn’t something I needed feminism to decode. I understood that this implied that women were weak—helpless victims in a man’s world. I didn’t need to know fuck about feminism to realize that the world around me wants me to be the victim—and actively tries to make me one.

In fact, I didn’t realize there was still an active, loud feminist movement in this country (and worldwide) until I was 17. Society does not fucking teach feminism. Society doesn’t try to steer women and girls off the path of righteousness by encouraging feminism. People become feminists because they saw the world for its shit a long time ago. Children are not stupid, you guys. If you perpetually put young girls in unsafe environments (or claim that any environment they find themselves in is inherently unsafe for them), they will find out about feminism. And they will mobilize. So if you make it your mission to throw dirt on feminists, you’re just fueling that inner 11-year-old who got her hair pulled by boys who thought she was ugly for having small breasts or not feminine enough or too ________ for a girl.

Feminism doesn’t teach us what’s wrong with the world, though sometimes it paints a better picture. Feminism teaches us how to act on the unfairness. The need for feminism starts young, m’dears. Feminism is not enlightenment. And when people realize it has been kept secret from them all those years in required schooling, they just get madder. Feminism is what people do when they realize our society’s conception of gender is fucked and that there is something they can do about it. I didn’t declare myself a feminist because I was bored or feeling particularly unattractive one day. I am a feminist because I realized all the shit that made me angry as a kid was an actual problem with the WORLD, not just “part of growing up.”

Filed under feminism misogyny sexism feminist misandry

404 notes

New idea.

FEMINISM: The Musical.

Featuring captivating numbers such as:

  • "Your Views On Sex Are Valid (Just Don’t Tell Others What To Do)"
  • "The Negative Effects Of Patriarchy On Men Are Not Misandry"
  • "Intersectionality Or Nothing"
  • "Most Suffragettes Were Racist (So Stop Referencing Them To Discredit Me)"
  • "Street Harassment Is Not A Compliment"
  • The Friendzone Is Bullshit/It’s OK To Be Just Friends”

Filed under feminism musical sexism misogyny feminist sexist misogynist

7 notes

[TW: Misogyny, violence against women] REPORT THIS BLOG: "Embrace misogyny"

We’ve got another one, Tumblr feminists. This blog just popped up yesterday and encourages horrific violence and hatred toward women because they “have the audacity to disrespect men after all (they’ve) given (us).”

Please be careful when clicking as he uses terrible gendered slurs and gifs of men hitting women and making them cry during sex. Get this POS off of Tumblr to stop him from perpetuating this sick mentality—nip him at the bud before he makes it a point to start harassing or triggering women.

Filed under feminism misogyny sexism feminist gendered violence

6 notes

People who complain about “unfunny feminists” are really getting on my nerves

And I’m not talking about the people who say “feminists can’t take a joke.” Those jerks are reserved for another post.

I’m talking about the people who go on feminism blogs to harass them and complain that they aren’t being entertaining. It’s usually when someone makes a post or starts a blog that tackles sexism by being sarcastic, using unconventional images (say, a 50s housewife or a Barbie doll making an angry comment about sexism) or by trying to make a joke about the offender’s stupidity that these troglodytes come out of the woodwork. This means the poster is now being harassed by people saying: “I wish you were funny” or “Try harder to make a joke next time” or, my favorite, “I WOULD like this blog if it were actually funny.”

Because that was our primary goal in our post that is calling out sexism—to be funny. To amuse you. It’s not like sexism is a serious issue, right? Discussion is worthless unless someone is laughing, isn’t it?

Get real, guys. Feminists aren’t here to amuse you. We’re not here to educate you. If we do decide to educate you, we’re not required to do it in a way that’s safe or fun for you. We are not here to make you comfortable.

Filed under feminism sexism misogyny rape culture feminist sexist misogynist facepalm i hate everything