Posts tagged feminism
Posts tagged feminism
Can the MRM explain why actual rape victims need to feel guilty because some people are scummy and lie about a serious crime like rape? I’m just really, really goddamn curious.
Sometimes I clean out my “other” folder on Facebook and find lovely little gems. The best part about this one? I’m not allowed to respond to it, and I can’t click on his profile, which leads me to the conclusion that he sent me this and immediately blocked me so I couldn’t find him. I sincerely hope the irony is not lost on him. Mucho amor to him for concluding that feminism is arrogant and feminists play victim while at the same time declaring that he knows what real equality is, complaining about his own victimization, then making it impossible to engage in discussion. Bravo, Chris Natale. Bravo.
Extra kudos for remembering to call me a cunt at the end.
My biggest issue with “if you want equal rights, why can’t I hit you?” isn’t just that it normalizes violence and puts an unsettling focus on the ability to continue being violent to women, but that its completely wipes out consent from the equation. People like to argue that men hit one another from time to time during fights, but fail to recognize that fights are, typically, consensual. And when they’re not, they’re more frowned upon than a consensual fight. You’re literally confused that women don’t want to be struck suddenly, without even the slightest awareness that the situation was going to get violent? Really? As if women aren’t already disproportionately victims of violent crime, but hitting a woman because you’re angry with her is not the same is an escalated conflict with another man (or anyone, really) in which the person was preparing for or had an inkling that violence might ensue. The concern with being allowed to hit women doesn’t come from a deep fear or a potential necessity for self-defense. It comes from a desire to make violence against women consumable. And that’s disturbing.
Perhaps I am,
but I want to know what the price is:
I don’t want to be beautiful
at my own expense
for the eyes of a tiger
When you see me walk on the heels of summer
best imagine me a rat in bloated sacks of trash
or a termite worming into your home
so if it occurs to you to approach me
you’ll snuff me out quick
and spare me the torment of a bird’s death
What is stunning plume
if my wings are clipped?
What is a home
if it is made of bars?
What is a song
if I’ve no inspiration to sing for myself?
It’s not a compliment if it all started the same way:
They were relentless
Followed me home
Threatened to bare all of me in the public
And took a greedy, grubby handful
of the most private part of me
as I wept and I begged;
For each word supposed to be gentle praise I got a lashing
“Hey, baby. You’re beautiful” they all told me
but I was never warned that no meant worse than two letters
In fact I was always told pain was art
and that art was beauty,
but I am not an adornment
waiting quietly on the walls:
I have a molten core within me
and I owe you nothing for what you’ve beholden
because you are a patron of fine arts,
but not a patron of me
for I cannot be consumed
I’m sick of beer running down
the front of my dress
because someone declared more artful than I
by a god I never knew existed
wasn’t intelligent enough to rub a handful of brain cells together
to remember my humanity
I’m sick of cold mornings
disrobed and alone on my bed
because some tortured poet
couldn’t find that old candle flame
he waxed on about
within himself long enough to stick around
I’m stick of future business leaders
and laureates sitting pretty
with cushy words
weeping for a poverty they consider themselves expert in
because they read the Communist Manifesto
Your education doesn’t put bread in their mouths
and your books and inky fingers
your calculus class, your bank account
your art piece in a big city
is no equivalent to running water
you are helping to purge
the more your gluttony grows
I’m sick of men in suits wanting to be seen
instead of letting us be heard
5/22/14 11:59 a.m.
My work has a huge basket of free tampons in the women’s restroom. Do you guys know how considerate and life-saving that is???
Do you guys remember the time I made a post about all the times I was sexually harassed and assaulted, and MRAs reblogged it telling me to shut the fuck up and that I was stupid and that I wasn’t allowed to speak because my post didn’t give enough attention to men? I said I didn’t care about “misandry” because even if it existed, women should not have to sacrifice or make space in their movements because a lot of us are actively being destroyed and we don’t need someone else’s movement used as a weapon against us.
So what did MRAs do? They came at me, ridiculed me and continued to do so after I asked them to stop all in the name of male rape victims. Y’know, because they so obviously care about rape victims, which is why they spoke to me the way they did. Yes. Good ol’ caring MRAs. Always looking out for their own best interest. Oh wait, I meant “always looking out for other people.” Yes good.
Hi folks, I was wondering if any of you ever have nightmares not exactly related to rape or abuse during times of extreme stress, especially when you’ve been thinking a lot about your traumas? That is, do any of you have dreams that, regardless of content, make you wake up fearful and anxious (perhaps in or near tears) during times when your trauma has been a center focus? I keep having scary dreams that I wake up from feeling panicked, even though I’m not sure why, and I think it’s because I’ve been thinking about my rape a lot lately. Is this normal?
It scares the living shit out of me that there are people out there who can empathize with a fetus but not a pregnant person.
It really bothers me when men laud scenes in films featuring violence against women as “cinematic masterpieces.” Their words may say film and art critique, but my mind only translates it as: “I think societal pressure means I can’t beat, harass, abuse or rape women, so I’ll just enjoy it on screen when I can use the excuse that it’s ‘only a movie’ to justify it.”